Actually we function fairly well!
We are taking our everyday challenges and choosing to laugh through them.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

EPIC PARENT FAILING GOING ON!!!!

Sometimes it seems like I ask the Lord to show me something and I don't see anything in any real quick turn around time. But other times I ask and Wow, He shows me something pretty profound and right when I ask for it.
I asked him what was hurting him?
Tonight we went to a skating party that Hayden and Zev got invitations to when school ended last week for them. It seems a local church rented out the skating rink in fort walton to throw a party for the kids as a celebration for finishing school. As I sat there I kept trying to find other kids or parents that I knew from school so I could have someone to sit and talk with but I and the kids could only recognize two others. So I kept to myself and figured they all must be from the regular elementary building or somewhere else as we are in a different building in a special program. It was a great night, our admission and every one else's was paid for, along with pizza, drinks, dessert and two hours of skating fun. As the night was ending I needed to thank someone for including my family in this celebration and I found a lady who seemed to be in the know? Yes, She told me that she was from the church that sponsored the event. I introduced myself and thanked her for inviting us. I told her that I really didn't recognize any but two of the kids. She said "one of our members has a son in your TD group at school so we wanted to include those kids as well but these kids are all either kids in crisis, or in orphan care awaiting foster hope"
My heart sank... As I replayed the last two hours in my mind. I never once saw a child that I wouldn't want to take home myself. Never heard one bad word. Never saw any arguments. And there weren't 5 or 10. This is the sick part! There were 50 or 60! They were black, white, boys, girls, they were between the ages of 4 or 5 to maybe 15.
They are good kids!!! This is what hurts him!!!!!!! Among many other things!
 PARENTS THESE KIDS NEED YOU!! IF you do not want to be a parent, then quit being so selfish and do something about it! If it is too late then grow up and take some responsibility for your actions. It is not your childs fault that it was born. This is not a kitten that you can just leave and hope that someone takes good care of it. Fact of the matter is there aren't many places or people with the right intentions left. YOU, You made this baby. You gave it life, whether you should have or not it is here and God entrusted you to take care of it, to teach it to love. And YES, you will need to QUIT smoking, drinking, and you can NEVER under any circumstances cause or allow someone to hurt your babies or anything else that is harmful. You might need to shop on the clearance rack, thrift store or receive used items for yourself or even go without so that you can provide whatever your child needs. It is not about you anymore, it is about this little person who cannot make it without you! I am tired too, get over it, Be a parent!
We live in one of the most beautiful areas in the country, not only beautiful, but this area is in ok shape too! This is unacceptable! There is so much hurt around the world already, especially children and now we in such a healthy nation are contributing to it as well and it is all because of selfishness. No I am not saying all parents are failing. Reality is a good portion are...
What I seen tonite makes me hurt!
I will do whatever I need to do to take care of my children, to show them love, and keep us together in this fallen world. I am sorry Lord!




Saturday, May 26, 2012

To everything there is a season...

The Bible says for everything and every activity under the sun there is a season    
a time to be born and a time to die,  
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time for war and a time for peace.. Ecclesiastes 3


How profound that scripture is! 
We can easily find times to plant, build, laugh, dance, gather, embrace and mend. 
But who has or even wants to uproot, tear down, weep, and war?
Fact of the matter is, they are a must! Even a bigger fact is, as hard as they may be, they may actually be to our benefit. Some times they are lessons but most times they are for our benefit because he actually does know what is best for us.
For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to give you a hope and a future.. Jer 29:11
What we must do is learn to trust him more. One of my favorite stories is when the Lord led the Isrealites out of bondage. They walked and walked finally getting a taste of freedom for the first time. Then they come to what seems like a dead end with soldiers approaching... God did not lead them to that rock just to get slaughtered right there. He said in some different words then mine "Will you trust me?" Although they did for a minute there and continued on in their journey, they still battled trust issues as we all do and they made their own journey much longer then it needed to be. I am sure I am the only Isrealite left that does that! 
Seasons can last 40 years, 8 years or even a few weeks. The hard part is when you are in one of the bad ones for too long or a good one not long enough. Then there is the whole "seasons inside of seasons" thing too! If you don't know what that is, thats just ok too, be glad! 
I would never have chosen a season where I would become a single and sole parent of 3 kids under the age of 3 and for 8 years now, I didn't ask to add some special needs to be thrown in the mix, or to struggle so much. But I know that I begged him for these children, and that they and I have a purpose, whether we know what it is yet or not. That my struggles are small when tossed among others. Just because a season may linger, doesn't mean I have done anything wrong. It may affect me but may not be about me at all. 
Ok, so here is my advice to myself or you during a new or old unwanted season:
I will try and trust you more... Psalm 56:3
While I am waiting, I will serve him...Psalm 27:14
Do everything unto the lord... Col 3:23
Show me your ways, teach me your paths... Psalm 25:4
Choose heavenly rewards over earthly riches... Hebrews 11:26
Have faith- And when you have doubt, look back at the past promises of God.
Thank you Lord for seasons. Whether I want them to come or not, there is a time to weep, scatter, build and make new, forgive me when my flesh is weak, the devil is a liar and I will try and trust in you. Here I am Lord, send me!